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| Posted By: guest Posted On: Apr 9, 2006 Views: 788 | Once, when I was a caddy... So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice. |
| Posted By: banguests Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 762 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... Drop acid often? |
| Posted By: adam Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 759 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... that is the best story ever, i wish i could romp the fields of tibet with the dalai lama. I spent alot of time in the mountains of tibet with monks who put their fingers in my bum....that is how i have grown to be so wise in the art of poo |
| Posted By: Wes Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 747 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... sounds more like a shroom trip |
| Posted By: Carl Spackler Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 739 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... Not shrooms, I think it's a hybrid. This is a cross, ah, of Bluegrass, Kentucky Bluegrass, Featherbed Bent, and Northern California Sensemilia. The amazing stuff about this is, that you can play 36 holes on it in the afternoon, take it home and just get stoned to the bejeezus-belt that night on this stuff |
| Posted By: Nougat Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 731 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... Forgive me for not interpreting sarcasm correctly (if that's the case) -- Have none of you seen Caddyshack? |
| Posted By: Carl Spackler Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 722 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... I have. What an incredible Cinderella story, this unknown comes outta no where to lead the pack, at Augusta. He's on his final hole, he's about 455 yards away - he's gonna hit about a two-iron I think. Oh he got all of that one! The crowd is standing on its feet here, the normally reserved Augusta crowd - going wild - for this young Cinderella, he's come outta no where, he's got about 350 yards left, he's gonna hit about a five-iron, don't you think? He's got a beautiful backswing - that's - Oh he got all of that one! He's gotta be pleased with that, the crowd is just on its feet here, uh - He's the Cinderella boy, uh - tears in his eyes I guess as he lines up this last shot, he's got about 195 yards left, he's got about a - its looks like he's got about an eight-iron. This crowd has gone deathly silent, the Cinderella story, outta no where, a former greenskeeper now - about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac - It's in the Hole! |
| Posted By: bible boy Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 719 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... in other words... What an incredible Cinderella story, this unknown blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah . It looks like a mirac - It's in the Hole! |
| Posted By: Carl Spackler Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 710 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... I have to laugh, because I've outsmarted even myself. My enemy, my foe, is an animal. In order to conquer the animal, I have to learn to think like an animal. And, whenever possible, to look like one. I've gotta get inside this guy's pelt and crawl around for a few days. |
| Posted By: foe Posted On: Apr 10, 2006 Views: 698 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... why don't you go spackle a hot carl on your mothers vagina and get back to me when you stop crawling around in it like an animal |
| Posted By: Carl Spackler Posted On: Apr 11, 2006 Views: 694 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... I'll slack you off, you fuzzy little foreigner. |
| Posted By: Carl Spackler Posted On: Apr 12, 2006 Views: 661 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... I smell varmint poontang, and the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang, I think |
| Posted By: Bob Gakley Posted On: Apr 13, 2006 Views: 646 | RE: Once, when I was a caddy... Carl...wtf is wrong with you? Varmint poontang? I bet you like that varmint poontang. You seem like a varmint poontang kind of guy. |