Swing Vote
What could swing your vote? [1439 votes total]

Candidate chases a chicken around like Rocky at every campaign stop (31)
 2%
Candidate sets Guiness Record for eating most amount of ping pong balls (11)
 1%
Candidate promises to rename Iraq-- (insert your name here)ville (29)
 2%
Candidate breakdances on a bed of nails. (23)
 2%
In speeches the candidate only uses the word 'Snarf' in different tones and emphasis. (51)
 4%
Candidate becomes BFF with Ashton Kutcher (16)
 1%
Candidate declares porn watching as the new 'national pastime' (78)
 5%
Candidate challenges all detractors to 'kickboxing smackdowns! mano a mano, bitch!' (48)
 3%
Candidate promises a free monkey butler for every household (135)
 9%
Candidate says everytime he's caught in a lie he'll write 'LIE BOY' on his forehead with a sharpee. (176)
 12%
Candidate bites two eyes, nose, and mouth in a piece of bologna and sticks his tongue through (23)
 2%
Candidate's wife shows her boobs (136)
 9%
Candidate promises to paint the white house 'stripey like fruit stripe' (17)
 1%
Candidate smokes a big spliff and mumbles something about releasing "secret UFO files that are really cool". (188)
 13%
Candidate changes his name to the other candidates name just to make everything crazy. (53)
 4%
Candidate promises to turn the Presidency into a big reality show. (61)
 4%
All of the above except number 6. (232)
 16%
None of the above. This poll belongs in the dumpster (131)
 9%


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