Oscar Improvement
What would be the best improvement to the Oscars? [1219 votes total]

All celebs have to apply their own makeup in the dark (60)
 5%
No speeches. The Oscars get hucked out into the audience. (151)
 12%
The Red Carpet has red paint landmines. (89)
 7%
The audience reacts to speeches like the crowd on Showtime at the Apollo. (85)
 7%
There are no winners. Only losers. And super losers. (42)
 3%
Winners have to eat a whole thing of cotton candy in under a minute or their Oscar gets revoked. (45)
 4%
A whole bunch of kids are in the audience and they all have red laser pointers for booby, crotch and nostril pointing. (96)
 8%
The host is Crispin Glover. (61)
 5%
The host is Anna Nicole Smith. (46)
 4%
The host is Mike Tyson. (28)
 2%
Personal stalkers accompany their obsession as their date. (44)
 4%
Someone pukes. (29)
 2%
There's urinal cams in the urinal cake in the bathroom. (33)
 3%
Ex-personal assistants get to make the acceptance speeches. (73)
 6%
Celebs have to squeeze their own nipples the whole time. (89)
 7%
All speeches have to be made with a handful of pebbles in the mouth. (17)
 1%
This poll sucks extra super. (78)
 6%
All of the above. (97)
 8%
None of the above. Yawn. (56)
 5%


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