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Posted By: For fun!

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1219
George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)






George Carlin's Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old
is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited
about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and
a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the
next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're
gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21.
Even the words sound like a ceremony . . . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound
like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now,
you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the
brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50


But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a
day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch;
you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the
90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a
little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height.
Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them "

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening,
whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's
workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who
is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.


7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family,
pets,keepsakes, music, plant s, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your
refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is
unstable,improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9 Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next
county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.


AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the
moments that take our breath away.


And if you don't send this to at least 8 people - who cares? But do
share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each
day!!

Posted By: TK

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1215
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

This is stupid. Stop posting this crap. He isn't funny.

Posted By: Evan

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1193
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

Its not meant to be funny, doffus. You're supposed to realize how profound and true of a statement it is

Posted By: TK

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1189
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

It isn't profound. It is just stupid.

Posted By: Doofus

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1182
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

Penis

Posted By:

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1181
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

it's not funny. it's not profound. George Carlin is not brilliant at all, he's a mediocre comic.

Posted By:

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1180
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

and he probably has a small penis

Posted By: James

Posted On: Jan 17, 2006
Views: 1177
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

Right, thats why he's still a comic that people pay to see after all these years.


Christians, people in government, and big buissness (all the same really) all seem not to like him for some reason....

Posted By: TK

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1173
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

James you are nuts. You make no sense! If you take away all the christians, big business, and religions there aren't anyone left to go see him. The only people paying to see George Carlin are old people that used to listen to him when they were young and stoned and thought he was funny.

Posted By: James

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1169
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

TK, STFU. I said they were pretty much the same thing. All trying to **** the peopple for the money. Old people tend not to keep up with current events, which is most of his comedy. It's for smart people, so naturaly, you'd not get it. Start by watching the news for a few weeks then see him. Course, anything is funny after the news......

Posted By: TK

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1166
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

I'm sorry I am just a stupid kid and I don't get it yet! Hell I can't even understand most of the words he use's, there way above my 6th grade reading level. One day I will growe up and realize what a dip **** I was at this age. Once I grab my paint can and start huffin again I'll probibly wright back that this wasn't me wrighting this and stuff. But oh well gota love times of reality. Now back to killin brain cells.

Posted By: Smart Lady

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1162
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

George Carlin totally rocks! I've watched pretty much every single thing that has done on TV, and read a couple of his books. He is brilliantly funny! I must admit that I don't like his views on religion, but I just bear with it until the next topic because I don't want to miss anything. You guys against him are probably just so close-minded that you can't even hear what he's saying. Not only is he funny, but he always has a good point that I often think about in life.

Posted By: TK

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1159
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

DAMN IT I said George Carlin is lame and that is it. If you like him you are old and like stupid stuff. Whoever posted that fake post as me (James) needs to go back to school. You misspelled half the words.

Posted By: Smart Lady

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1157
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

Hey, TK! Why are you such a hater?! Everyone is entitled to their own opinions.

Also, why do you feel like you have to impress everyone with material things? Who gives a big rat's ass if you have a PS3 or not? I don't! Maybe you should try getting out of the house more, you could probably use the exercise. Grow up!

By the way, I'm a totally hot (not old) chick! I just happen to be smart enough to get George Carlin and appreciate his humor. I know a lot of other not old chicks that like him as well...

Posted By: Admiral John

Posted On: Jan 18, 2006
Views: 1145
RE: George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)

George Carlin is a member of my "Holy Trinity" of comics: George Carlin, Robin Williams and Steve Martin. I can listen to a George Carlin routine over and over and laugh like hell every time.

HOWEVER, some people find his schtick old and tired, and really don't care for him. Guess what? That doesn't make you any better than me, nor does my enjoyment of George Carlin make me any better than you. So lighten up.

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