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Posted By:

Posted On: Aug 8, 2006
Views: 502
RE: No thanks

1. It is still not last minute and in your fantasy world, anything can happen.

2. X-ray has nothing to do with MRI. x-ray images are made with radioactive material blasting through your body and exposing film. MRI creates images based on the magnetic resonance of molecules. None of this changes the fact that your veterinarian could xray your head to see where the so-called metal plate was.

2b. I didn't forget the tear duct. I just didn't care.


Posted By: Dragonmaster

Posted On: Aug 8, 2006
Views: 497
RE: No thanks

1. Well since I have the form to pay for it already, I guess someone at the dr. office could leave an oxygen tank open and blow up or something. Or Bush could push the big red button.

2. The first part was seperated by Anyway... I was trying to make a joke about the metal plates in my head. Walk near a running MRI with some ferrous metal on you and see what happens. Whatever, that doctor has done lots of operations already in that area, he can assist the other doctor with things like scar tisue, wear the plates are, and any other complications that may come by, much better than he could by reading it in a file.

2b. That sounds like one of my excuses when I **** up...

3. Why the **** are we arguing over this ****?


Posted By: Dragonmaster

Posted On: Aug 8, 2006
Views: 495
RE: No thanks

Raul Trinidad,

Thanks. There's one bid so far. It cost me about $18 in materials, so it's a self paid hobby.


Posted By: Dragonmaster

Posted On: Aug 8, 2006
Views: 490
RE: No thanks

So, I need a laugh. MEAT!!!

"They're made out of meat."

"Meat?"

"Meat. They're made out of meat."

"Meat?"

"There's no doubt about it. We picked up several from different parts of the planet, took them aboard our recon vessels, and probed them all the way through. They're completely meat."

"That's impossible. What about the radio signals? The messages to the stars?"

"They use the radio waves to talk, but the signals don't come from them. The signals come from machines."

"So who made the machines? That's who we want to contact."

"They made the machines. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Meat made the machines."

"That's ridiculous. How can meat make a machine? You're asking me to believe in sentient meat."

"I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. These creatures are the only sentient race in that sector and they're made out of meat."

"Maybe they're like the orfolei. You know, a carbon-based intelligence that goes through a meat stage."

"Nope. They're born meat and they die meat. We studied them for several of their life spans, which didn't take long. Do you have any idea what's the life span of meat?"

"Spare me. Okay, maybe they're only part meat. You know, like the weddilei. A meat head with an electron plasma brain inside."

"Nope. We thought of that, since they do have meat heads, like the weddilei. But I told you, we probed them. They're meat all the way through."

"No brain?"

"Oh, there's a brain all right. It's just that the brain is made out of meat! That's what I've been trying to tell you."

"So ... what does the thinking?"

"You're not understanding, are you? You're refusing to deal with what I'm telling you. The brain does the thinking. The meat."

"Thinking meat! You're asking me to believe in thinking meat!"

"Yes, thinking meat! Conscious meat! Loving meat. Dreaming meat. The meat is the whole deal! Are you beginning to get the picture or do I have to start all over?"

"Omigod. You're serious then. They're made out of meat."

"Thank you. Finally. Yes. They are indeed made out of meat. And they've been trying to get in touch with us for almost a hundred of their years."

"Omigod. So what does this meat have in mind?"

"First it wants to talk to us. Then I imagine it wants to explore the Universe, contact other sentiences, swap ideas and information. The usual."

"We're supposed to talk to meat."

"That's the idea. That's the message they're sending out by radio. 'Hello. Anyone out there. Anybody home.' That sort of thing."

"They actually do talk, then. They use words, ideas, concepts?"
"Oh, yes. Except they do it with meat."

"I thought you just told me they used radio."

"They do, but what do you think is on the radio? Meat sounds. You know how when you slap or flap meat, it makes a noise? They talk by flapping their meat at each other. They can even sing by squirting air through their meat."

"Omigod. Singing meat. This is altogether too much. So what do you advise?"

"Officially or unofficially?"

"Both."

"Officially, we are required to contact, welcome and log in any and all sentient races or multibeings in this quadrant of the Universe, without prejudice, fear or favor. Unofficially, I advise that we erase the records and forget the whole thing."

"I was hoping you would say that."

"It seems harsh, but there is a limit. Do we really want to make contact with meat?"

"I agree one hundred percent. What's there to say? 'Hello, meat. How's it going?' But will this work? How many planets are we dealing with here?"

"Just one. They can travel to other planets in special meat containers, but they can't live on them. And being meat, they can only travel through C space. Which limits them to the speed of light and makes the possibility of their ever making contact pretty slim. Infinitesimal, in fact."

"So we just pretend there's no one home in the Universe."

"That's it."

"Cruel. But you said it yourself, who wants to meet meat? And the ones who have been aboard our vessels, the ones you probed? You're sure they won't remember?"

"They'll be considered crackpots if they do. We went into their heads and smoothed out their meat so that we're just a dream to them."

"A dream to meat! How strangely appropriate, that we should be meat's dream."

"And we marked the entire sector unoccupied."

"Good. Agreed, officially and unofficially. Case closed. Any others? Anyone interesting on that side of the galaxy?"

"Yes, a rather shy but sweet hydrogen core cluster intelligence in a class nine star in G445 zone. Was in contact two galactic rotations ago, wants to be friendly again."

"They always come around."

"And why not? Imagine how unbearably, how unutterably cold the Universe would be if one were all alone ..."

the end


Posted By: someone

Posted On: Aug 9, 2006
Views: 483
RE: No thanks

Umm... I just want to say I didn't read that.


Posted By: Dragonmaster

Posted On: Aug 9, 2006
Views: 480
RE: No thanks

Um, Ok then.


Posted By:

Posted On: Aug 11, 2006
Views: 462
RE: No thanks

RESPONSE 5


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